• gigastasio@sh.itjust.works
        1·
        4 days ago

        Alone?

        Come over. I’ve got two pillows and you can have one. Or if you’re into it, we can use the same pillow. Like…idk, taking turns or doing like a tandem or tag-team…it’s really up to you and your comfort zone.

  • TouchMacaque@lemmy.caEnglish
    1·
    5 days ago

    My step zaida told me that for Ramadan this year she’s getting me a new phone so I can comment on things and get free dopamine from all the likes I get but after 1 hour all I got was this stupid t shirt that says “I’ve got Parkinson’s and I’m not afraid to show it”. I fucking hate it so I shredded it and gave it to my pet warbler named Parkinson to use in his nest but even he didn’t want it. Now I’m stuck with some shitty shredded t shirt covered in bird shit and I don’t know what to do anymore, I think I’ll go back to college for accounting and become a taxidermist so I call stuff my damn bird full of shredded t shirts. Yeah, that sounds good.